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Then jet the blue tent topple, stars rain down, and god or void appall us till we drown in our own tears: today we start to pay the piper with each breath, yet love knows not of death nor calculus above the simple sum of heart plus heart.

-plath

/10:18 pm

i feel so wrong recently..
so many things have happened..
it feels like im forced to grow up overnight..
he said i should harden myself and protect myself so i wont get hurt..
not to trust people so easily..
but i dont want to become one of those people who i dont like..
i dont want to be like them..
its ok to be hurt..
cos thats when i knew who my friends are..
you who comfort me at 2am in the morning.. whispering to me and listening to me cry...
you who said that she saves her tears for other people to see.. while i save tears so that no one would see.. that im putting on a strong front..
but you're right.. im not strong...
i dont cry because i dont have enough strength to even cry..
i dont cry because i have lost faith in my world...
i dont cry because you left me so helpless and made me realise how hard it feels to be wronged...
im surrounded by ugly people who play dirty political tricks on me..
people who spoilt my perfect world...
by being nice to me and saying things they thought i wouldnt know behind my back..
but u know what..
even if im blinded.. my friends are not...
i know exactly what you've said and done..
and let me tell you that time will tell..
cut all your pretense.. cos u look so ugly with a plastered face..
the ugliest person ive ever seen..
u did the ugliest things to me and thinking that i wont retaliate..
but dont push my limits.. adn dont push your luck..
cos you wont want to see me when i throw your tantrum right back into your face..
thank you.. you who made me see who you really are and come out of my shelter to see the real world...
and thank you... you who supported me and had been here with me even though i had known you for only a while..
and thank you... you who believed me and had tried to cheer me up even though you knew it was too hard a try..
you kept me believing in friendship..and that life is still worth living
i want to learn to be stronger
so strong that i would not be hurt by people anymore.. people whoare not worth my tears...
i'll pick myself up.. and i will grow stronger after every tomorrow and forget some sorrow after every yesterday..
to all the people whom i love: you are so precious.. i love you...

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Wanna travel to all the faraway places in the world. Books and coffee are necessities. Caffeine addict. Daydreamer. Loner at times, party animal other times. Intuitive. The Grand Canyon. Sunshine in winter days. Music. Photography. Art. Crayons. Chocolat Noir. My green sunhat. Glasses. Piano. Le Solitude. French. Travel. Life. ♥Love & Love

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